Do you know how to do an Eskimo roll in your river kayak or sea kayak? It's a pretty important technique to know if you're going to be running the big river rapids and paddling the cold ocean. Try as I might, I still haven't gotten it down.

MOAC President "Tugeye" Dan figured it would be a heckuva an idea to do a demonstration on kayak rolling technique at last week's MOAC meeting in Portland. So, being the imaginative guy that he is, he designed and built a contraption to practice kayak rolling indoors. In theory, anyway. Leave it to Dan to engineer the world's first and only dry-rolling practice machine.

Well, he got the thing finished a few hours before the meeting, hauled it in and set it up in the meeting hall just in time. You just had to be there to see this. Wooden stocks, a big steel tube, kayak cradle, and the whole thing rotates to allow the roll (again, in theory).

Sea kayaking guru Al, clearly a very brave and daring man, came forward to test out this new dry-rolling set-up. The "crew" strapped him securely into the cockpit of the kayak and, after a brief preview of rolling principles...

Over Al went.

And over everyone in the audience went too. Bent over double and roaring with laughter. It was hilarious. I damn near peed myself.

Straps loosened, the boat slipped, and I swear the whole contraption was going to come undone and dump Al right out onto his unhelmeted head! There was muttering about "mechanical advantage" or "center of gravity" or some technical mumbo jumbo (you gotta love engineers!), as Al hung upside down with apparently little or no hope of ever turning back up.

But finally, with just a bit of assistance from the crew (well, maybe quite a bit of help!), and exhibiting superior dry-rolling technique, Al came back up and over to the cheers of the crowd, completing a semi-successful indoor Eskimo roll.

It was quite a visual experience. I can't honestly say that I learned much, but I got a helluva a good belly laugh out of it!

See if you can pick up any tips...

Thanks to photographer Becky Delaney for providing the photos!

Kayaking guru Al starts to roll, as inventor Dan looks on...

The "Dry" Roll, Phase 1.

The "Dry" Roll, Phase 2.

The "Dry" Roll, Phase 3.

The "Dry" Roll, Phase 4.

The "Dry" Roll, Phase 5.

OK, now what?

Back up and over (with help!)

A successful Eskimo roll (sort of!)